85 News Puns That Will Make You the Headliner of Humor!

Struggling to craft the perfect news-related pun for your social media posts?

You’re not alone.

As a social media aficionado, I know how tough it can be to strike the right balance between clever and cringey.

But fear not! This collection of news puns is your go-to guide for witty wordplay that’ll make your captions pop and your followers smile.

Whether you’re a brand manager or a pun enthusiast, these puns are here to make your creativity front-page news.

Ready? Let’s dive in!

News Puns

• New day, new news!
• That’s a news-ance!
• Good NewsT ravels Fast!
• News flash: You’re awesome!
• Breaking News: We’re on a roll!
• I’ve got news-ical chairs to play!
• That’s some news-tastic information!
• Breaking news? More like braking news!
• When the fog lifted, the news was mist.
• In other news: I finally found my keys!
• You’re the best news I’ve heard all day!
• Newsflash! I just tripped over a headline.
• Front page or not, I always make the news.
• The news was so magnetic, it pulled me right in!
• No news is good news—unless you’re a journalist.
• No need to broadcast it, I already got the news.
• In a world full of noise, be the news that matters.
• I’ve got a nose for news and a heart for headlines.
• I started a news diet—I only consume headlines now.
• When you have good news, you just can’t headline it.
• I’m feeling so fresh today, like I’m the latest news!
• News flash- I’m unstoppable!

• The crime reporter was arrested for breaking the news.
• In a world full of headlines, I prefer to be the news.
• Our news is so fresh, it’s still in the morning dew(s).
• Every time a news anchor lies, it’s a real false alarm.
• That joke was so old, it’s practically yesterday’s news.
• Today’s forecast: Cloudy with a chance of breaking news!
• News reporters love to stay ‘current,’ even ‘electric.’
• The newspaper biz is tough—you’ve got to deliver on time.
• Flaming hot news alert – this story is spreading like wildfire!
• That news was so layered, it should have come with an onion.
• The artist’s newspaper? A brush with news—paintings only!
• When the printer jammed, we got some real paperwork news.
• The baker’s newsstand flopped—all he sold were stale news!
• When the bakery went out of business, the news was crumby.
• She tried to break the news, but it was already in pieces.

• The news about the new library had the whole town booked.

• I’ve got some news for you: you’re the headline of my day!
• Good news travels fast—but gossip has its own private jet.
• The gossip is so juicy, it should be on the 10 o’clock news!
• The editor ran a special edition for feline readers—The Mews!
• I have a habit of recycling old news—it’s how I stay current.

• When the fashion news broke, it really buttoned up its story.

• You heard it here first—I’m always the first to share the news.

• The cooking channel’s latest dish is sizzling up some spicy news.

• When they told me, it was like hearing news from the grapevine.
• I read the news today, oh boy – it was quite the current event.

• The tech news was so groundbreaking, it left the competition buffering.

• The political news was so scandalous, it didn’t just break the internet—it shattered it!

• Hot off the press, and so is my coffee!

• That news was so juicy, I’m surprised it didn’t come with a napkin!
• The meteorologist-turned-reporter is always storming the newsroom!
• Hot off the press: My coffee was so fresh, it made the front page!
• I accidentally broke the TV, now that’s what I call breaking news!
• That news article was so hot, it could melt even the iciest hearts.
• I’m diving deep into today’s news – it’s a real ‘sub-marine’ story!
• The news was so fast, I almost got a ticket for speeding!
• I read the news in braille—it was a real feel-good story!

• I wrote an article on new restaurants – talk about tasty news bites!

• The bakery news was so fresh, it was hot off the press-croissant.

• The space news was stellar; it definitely had people over the moon.

• The news was so shocking, I had to reboot my brain like a computer!
• The editor got salty and published a pirate edition—The News Arrrgh!
• The newspaper editor always has a sixth sense for detecting fake news.
• I got a job at the newspaper, but I’m still trying to column my nerves.
• Wanted to be a news anchor, but couldn’t find a well-reported job.
• Read the news on toast—needed good headlines with breakfast!

• I tried reporting on the new ink, but it left me out of mint news.

• The news about the bakery was on a roll, and everyone found it bread-taking.

• When the chicken crossed the road, it made front-page news in the poultry press.

• Breaking the news, not your heart.

• When the cat heard the news, it was a purr-sonal crisis!
• The news was so spicy, it should’ve come with a glass of milk!
• I got the news hot off the press—so hot, I nearly burned my fingers!
• Bakery sale news spread like wildfire—everyone’s bread-and-butter!
• Plumber news went down the drain—just water under the bridge now.
• The news was so heavy, I needed a crane to lift my jaw off the floor!

• The space news about Mars found everyone orbiting around their screens.

• I like my news like my coffee—strong, bold, and with a little bit of sugar.

• The announcement of the new park renovation planted seeds of great news.

• Environmental news says we should recycle more, but it’s nothing paper can handle.

• I only trust the news when it’s written in black and white—like a penguin’s tuxedo.
• When I heard the news, I was floored—luckily, the carpet broke my fall!

• The story on renewable energy had so much power, it really charged up the newsroom!

And there you have it—your go-to stash of news puns, ready to make headlines in your posts.

But these puns are more than just laughs; they’re a way to shift your perspective on current events and boost your creative process.

Use them to bring humor and fresh insight to even the driest news cycle.

Remember, a clever pun isn’t just witty—it’s a powerful tool for connection and impact.

Now, go ahead and make your mark—one pun at a time.